The Incredible Hulk: Madness of Two
by Courier999
Summary: Jack McGee: Daily Bugle reporter, non-descript…except for the fact he's followed around by a physicist who turns into a green giant fueled by rage. And who gets chased by the military. And fights all manner of bad guys. Set in the same universe as "Spider-Man: Partners in Crime." Rated T for violence, language, and scary content. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

THE INCREDIBLE HULK: Madness of Two

_The Incredible Hulk_ and related characters are property of Marvel.

Chapter 1: The Angry Green Giant

"_McGee, get to my office!_"

Jack McGee rolled his eyes as he walked to see his boss.

"You wanted to see me, Mister Jameson?" he asked upon taking a seat.

"I did. I got a story for you."

"I thought I was already covering the mutant rights campaign-"

"Scrap the mutant rights stories for now. We got something big."

J. Jonah Jameson stabbed his cigar at the ashtray on his desk.

"Enlighten me."

"I'll give you the short version, McGee. All across the Southwest, there's been reports of some weird creature. They say it's big as a small building and has a tendency to destroy military hardware and anything nearby."

"Anything else?"

"It's green, looks kinda like a man, and shouts a lot."

"Last sighting?"

"Somewhere in Arizona. Booked you a plane to Phoenix."

"Thanks, boss."

SOME DAYS LATER:

McGee sat around a small campfire in the middle of the desert. So far, his hunt for what he had dubbed "The Not-So-Jolly Green Giant" had yielded nothing.

_It's a wild goose chase._

Suddenly, the ground began slightly shake in rhythmic patterns, as if giant footsteps were trodding on it.

"What the hell?"

The rumbling soon stopped, and was replaced by the sound of sand being shuffled.

"Who's there?"

McGee turned around and readied an air rifle. Out of the darkness emerged a haggard-looking man in what seemed to be the remains of a denim jacket and cargo pants.

"Who are you?" the reporter asked.

"Name's Bruce. Who are you?"

"Jack."

"Nice to meet you. Got any room in that tent for someone else?"

"Why do you ask?"

"I haven't slept in days."

"Sure, go ahead."

"So, Bruce, you want to explain why you're running through the desert in the middle of the night?"

"Military's after me."

"Why'd they be chasing after a guy like you?"

The tent grew silent.

"Mister McGee, don't make me angry. You won't like me when I'm angry."

Just then, an explosion rattled the ground.

"What the-"

"_BANNER! WE KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE! COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD AND CRAWLING ON YOUR KNEES!_" a voice echoed.

Bruce made his way out of the tent, while McGee watched out the front flap.

"Ross, I've complied with your demands. Don't do anything you'll regret."

"_YOU HEARD THE MAN! PUT YOUR WEAPONS DOWN!_" the voice echoed again.

_Screw that_. one soldier thought.

At that moment, the soldier lined up his rifle sights on Bruce and fired.

"I warned you, Ross…"

From his tent, McGee watched as his one-time guest grew into a giant green muscleman.

"HULK SMASH!" the newly transformed Banner yelled.

The reporter watched on in horror as the newly-christened "Hulk" tore the turret off a battle tank and threw it like a toy.

_You won't like me when I'm angry_…

McGee fainted.

The next morning, McGee wandered out of his tent and surveyed the carnage. The desert was littered with the remains of armored vehicles and other military hardware. Lying there in the sand was Banner, a weary look on his face.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: How Banner Learned to Stop Worrying

"So, care to explain to me _why_ you're being chased by _Thunderbolt Ross_ himself? And why you turned into the Jolly Green Giant with anger management issues?" McGee asked.

Banner looked up from the diner menu.

"It's a long story."

A waitress walked up.

"You two going to get something or not?"

"Southwest salad." McGee ordered.

"Hamburger. Wheat bun. Ketchup and Cheddar cheese, and nothing else." Bruce added.

"You want fries with that, son?"

"Yes, please."

The waitress walked away with their order.

"So, about that story, mister Banner?"

"It's _Doctor_ Banner, Culver Institute."

"Alright, _Doctor_. Go on, spill the beans."

"Mister McGee, are you familiar with Project Adonis?"

"No."

Bruce paused for a moment.

"It was an international project conducted by the Allies during World War II. It was supposed to create super-soldiers-" he continued.

"Yeah, I know what you're talking about now. But what does that have to do with you?"

"A few years ago, DOD found some of the serum in a fallout shelter in Manchester. They couldn't get the results they wanted it, so they handed it over to us at Culver."

"And?"

"Well, I proposed that the desired results could be obtained by irradiating the subject during administration of the serum."

"And?"

"Well, I tested it on myself, thus creating the dual creature you see before you."

The waitress returned with their orders.

"But you never explained how Ross got interested in chasing you."

"The big guy's not exactly harmless. Combine that with his ugly mug, and why wouldn't Ross be chasing me?"

"Point taken, Doctor."

"Alright, which one of you bozos shot at Banner?"

The soldiers lined up before Ross pointed at one man among them.

"Blomsky!"

"Yes?"

"I told you _not_ to shoot at Banner! That trigger finger of yours cost us millions in hardware!"

"I had that abomination in my sights!"

"It's the _Hulk_ that's the abomination, not Banner!"


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: The Daughter

General Ross idly thumbed through the latest issue of the _Daily Bugle_ as his plane descended toward the runway at Bluegrass Field.

"In a statement released yesterday, the mayor and chief of police wished the newly minted vigilante calling himself 'Iron Man' good luck…" he read.

As he continued to read the story, the plane hit the tarmac and came to a stop.

"_Thank you for flying Wolfman Air. Please collect your luggage and disembark in a careful and orderly manner._" a prerecorded announcement played.

General Ross rolled his eyes, gathered his belongings, and walked into the bright Kentucky sun.

HALF AN HOUR LATER:

"Anybody home?" Ross asked as he entered the house.

As if on cue, a young woman dashed towards the general and glomped him.

"Father! You're home!"_  
_

"Betty, let go…I can hardly breathe!"

Betty released her grasp on her father, who promptly dusted off his coat.

"So, how was your tour of service, Father?"

General Ross looked at his daughter's bespectacled face.

"Father?"

"It was middling. Every single time we had a chance of getting Banner, something ticked him off, and then the Hulk tore up the hardware!"

"Then why are you chasing him when you could try to reconcile with Banner?"

Ross chuckled.

"Betty, you remind me of your mother."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Temporary Quarters

"Thanks for the lift, chum!"

"No sweat."

Bruce and McGee exited the car and stepped out onto the side of the road. Before them was a sign that read as follows:

YOU ARE NOW ENTERING:

SLEEPY HOLLOW, NEW YORK

POPULATON: 9,870

"Well, it's a start."

"Welcome to the Horseman's Head. Now, what'll it be?"

"A pint of the local." McGee requested.

"Ice water."

The bartender looked at the new guests and poured their drinks, taking care to examine McGee's ID card.

"So, first time in Sleepy Hollow?"

"Yes, for both of us. We were wondering if there were any local attractions, discounting cemeteries, mansions, churches, and anything on the National Register of Historic Places." McGee answered.

"Well, that's pretty much everything. Unless you count the Xavier School, but that's about five miles from here-"

"Speak no more. I want to see it myself."

The spires and other architectural flourishes of the Xavier mansion loomed overhead as the two odd companions approached the gate.

"You go first, Mister McGee." Bruce offered.

McGee opened the old iron gate and approached the large oak slab that was the mansion's front door.

"Go on, see if anyone's home."

McGee balled his hand into a fist and knocked. Almost immediately, a redheaded woman opened the door.

"Go away. We don't take salesmen."

McGee stuck his foot in the door.

"I'm not a salesman!"

"Are you associated with the Friends of Humanity, the Brotherhood of Mutants, or any similar organizations?"

"No!"

"Are you a mutant?"

"No."

"Then you have no business here."

As if propelled by an unseen force, McGee went flying off the doorstep and into a nearby hedge.

"Plan B." he muttered as Banner walked over.

"But-"

"Do it already. Just don't leave too big a mess."

"But-"

"But what?"

"I'm not exactly in the mood to let the big guy out."

"Then do something, dammit!"

Bruce rolled his eyes, walked up to the door, and knocked. The door opened again, and this time a black woman in an alabaster-white jumpsuit and cape was behind it.

"Hello?"

"Hello to you, too."

"Why are you here?"

"My friend and I need somewhere to crash for a while, and we're running low on cash."

"And why did you choose here?"

"I've got some issues."

The door opened, and Bruce walked in. McGee followed.

"So you're the abnormally persistent visitors that Jean told me about."

McGee and Banner looked up at the bald man in a wheelchair before them.

"Yes, that would be us. And you are…"

The bald man extended his hand.

"Professor Charles Xavier."

"Bruce Banner."

"Jack McGee."

Xavier closed his eyes and concentrated.

"What's his deal?"

Xavier opened his eyes.

"I understand why doctor Banner seeks sanctuary here. But you, mister McGee, I do not."


	5. Child of Gamma- Part 1

Chapter 5: Child of Gamma, Part 1

"_So, how's everything out in the L.A. area, McGee?_"

"Great, Mister Jameson. Working on that Iron Man story now."

"_Nice to know. Now get back to work!_"

Jameson hung up.

_Well, at least it's a pretty place_.

McGee hummed along with the classical music playing on the car radio as he passed by groves of orange trees and vineyards. Suddenly, he sighted a young woman by the side of the road, waving her hands in the air.

"What seems to be the problem?" McGee asked after he got out of his car.

The woman popped her car's hood open, giving McGee a full view of the engine.

"Looks like your radiator's conked out, miss…"

"Walters. Jennifer Walters."

McGee shook the woman's hand.

"Need a lift?" he offered.

"I called a tow truck. It should be here soon-"

As if on cue, the tow truck arrived.

"It'll be a while before we can get a replacement for your car, miss Walters."

"Rick, are you sure you can't cannibalize a spare one?"

"It's not worth the trouble."

Jennifer began to storm out of the garage.

"Wait! I can take you!"

She turned around.

"Thanks for offering me a lift, mister…"

"McGee. Jack McGee, _Daily Bugle_."

Jennifer chuckled slightly.

"Oh, so you're the man Bruce was telling me about!"

"Bruce? As in Doctor Bruce Banner?"

"That'd be Cousin Bruce alright. One of the nicest guys on the planet as far as I know."

"Yeah, but he's got enough anger management issues to choke a basking shark."

McGee braked suddenly.

"What the-" Jennifer asked.

A police officer walked up to the car from a nearby roadblock.

"Excuse me, but what's the holdup, officer?"

"Someone thinks they saw the Juggernaut. We're just supposed to hold this until SHIELD pops up and does something."

"But I'm clearly not the Juggernaut, now am I?"

"Move along."

"Who's this Juggernaut the police are so worried about?" Jennifer asked as the car continued along.

"He's with that Brotherhood of Mutants thing, and he's basically a walking, talking, and shouting battering ram in human form. Once he gets started, he's like a freight train."

Before Jennifer could say anything, the car came to a sudden halt as a loud rumbling echoed from the ground.

"Earthquake?"

Just then, a large green man in abnormally large purple pants leapt over the car and landed in front of it.

"The hell was that?" Jennifer asked.

"Hulk." McGee answered.

A more steady rumbling ensued. McGee looked out the rearview mirror, and a large man wearing an odd helmet was running towards the car.

_Oh crap. Just where I didn't want to be._


	6. Child of Gamma- Part 2

Chapter 6: Child of Gamma, Part 2

"I'M THE JUGGERNAUT, YOU SON OF A BITCH!" the running man exclaimed.

"HULK SMASH PUNY JUGGERNAUT!"

"AS IF!"

"Miss Walters, hold onto something."

"Why-"

McGee floored it.

"You're a maniac, McGee!"

"So? I'm getting us away from the miniature _kaiju_ battle!"

"A what battle?"

"_Kaiju_! It's a Japanese fiction genre characterized by giant monsters like Godzilla!"

A sonic boom filled the air.

"Is that the military?"

McGee craned his neck out the window and saw a red and gold suit of powered armor.

"No, it's Iron Man's latest armor."

As if on cue, the armor fired off a missile, staggering the Juggernaut.

"HULK SMASH!"

Hulk swung a large green fist into Juggernaut's stomach.

"The hell was that?"

"That was your cousin!"

"Bruce doesn't look like that!"

"He does when he's mad as hell or in danger!"

McGee slammed on the brakes. Unfortunately, the car skidded off the road, fell into an embankment, and sideswiped a tree.

"Old McGee luck…" McGee muttered as he undid his seatbelt.

The reporter waited for the stars to clear from his eyes before checking on his passenger.

"Jennifer? You okay?"

Silence.

"Miss Walters?"

A groan of pain broke the silence. McGee turned around and saw Jennifer clutching herself, her clothes stained red.

"So, why me?" Bruce asked as he made himself comfortable in the backseat of Tony Stark's car.

"It's your _cousin_, Bruce."

"You could donate blood, McGee."

"We're incompatible. I'm Rh positive, she's Rh negative. You're Rh negative, at least according to your records."

"But what if I-"

"It's a gamble, but you're going to need to take it."

THAT NIGHT:

"You okay, McGee?"

McGee looked up at his companion.

"Depends on what you mean by okay. I didn't take too much damage in that crash, but I wasn't thinking clearly then."

"Get some sleep, Jack. You'll need it."

Meanwhile, in her hospital bed, something began to change with Jennifer Walters.

_Why do I suddenly feel like I could take on the world? _she thought.

As if on cue, her skin, hair, and eyes turned green. Within her, muscles and bones became stronger and more durable. Her heart and lungs became stronger and more efficient to keep up, and she gained a healing factor. Within minutes, the changes were complete.

THE NEXT MORNING:

"What the-"

McGee was speechless as he saw the figure that had replaced Jennifer. There, in the hospital bed, was a 7-foot tall green-skinned woman with nearly-impossible proportions.

"Come on, don't be shy. Tell me if I look good."

McGee hemmed and hawed at the scene before him.

"McGee? Is everything-"

Bruce saw the figure on the bed and fainted on the spot.


	7. The Leader- Part 1

Chapter 7: The Leader, Part 1

General Ross was speechless as he entered his daughters's room. Upon the wall nearest to her bed was a large map of the United States, adorned with index cards and pushpins. Each card was labeled with a location and date- the same locations and dates of his encounters with the Hulk.

_When she gets up, we're going to need to talk._

LOS ANGELES:

"Jameson, I got the pics of the X-Men vs. Sentinel battle at the Hollywood Mall."

"_Good to hear, McGee. I'll be in touch_."

"Nice chatting with you, boss."

The call ended, and McGee left the hotel business center for the parking garage.

Back at the Ross residence, the elder Ross looked at Betty with a look of irritation on his face.

"Betty, how'd you get all the information about my encounters with the Hulk?"

"Your official reports. They weren't exactly confidential."

"But what's got you interested in the Hulk, exactly?"

Betty looked up from her breakfast.

"You know that Bruce and I both attended Culver together! You were there when he got his doctorate about three years ago!"

"And then I hired him and had to clean up the mess from his harebrained scheme."

An awkward silence settled over the dining room, only to be broken by Betty's sudden departure from the room.

"So…cold…"

"Can it, Toad."

"Easy for you to say, Mystique."

The blue-skinned redhead rolled her eyes as she lay in wait in the Lexington Cemetery for her target. Just as she snapped back behind a headstone, she saw her prey.

"It's just so beautiful out here in winter…" Betty commented to no one in particular.

Suddenly, she became aware of someone lurking behind her.

_Nah. Just my imag-_

A large blunt object struck her in the back of the head, knocking the younger Ross out.

"Now what?" Toad asked as Mystique carried the unconscious Betty to their hiding place.

"We wait until the Leader's contact shows up."

"Funny…you didn't tell Magneto about this-"

Mystique grabbed the small mutant by his shirt collar.

"This isn't for the Brotherhood, dullard. It's for a newfound friend."

Just then, a decent-sized car pulled up.

"Is that-"

Out of the car emerged a loathsome and squat creature with gray skin.

"Load 'er up!"

Mystique hoisted the driver up by his shirt collar.

"I give the orders around here, Gargoyle. And don't you forget that."


	8. The Leader- Part 2

Chapter 8: The Leader, Part 2

SOMEWHERE IN SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA

A FEW DAYS LATER:

"Ah, Miss Darkhölme. A pleasure to see you."

"Spare me the formalities, Sterns. You owe the Brotherhood of Mutants a few favors now that we've done your dirty work."

"We're not quite done, Mystique. We need a blood sample-"

"I don't think the Hulk will let me get close enough to stick a syringe in his arm."

Sterns turned around, giving Mystique and Toad a good look at the jaundiced skin that surrounded his large head.

"We don't need Banner."

"Then how-"

"There is a smaller specimen, and a female one to boot."

"Where?"

"Los Angeles."

"And you expect us to deal with this 'She-Hulk' _how_?"

Sterns snapped his fingers, and a man in a white suit emerged from behind.

"Mister Killian, accompany our friends for this…operation. Your skills will prove handy indeed."

"It's L.A, McGee. People see weird things here all the time."

"But Miss Walters-"

"Call me Jennifer. We're friends."

"How about neither, and we settle for She-Hulk?"

"Deal."

McGee winced as the newly-dubbed She-Hulk squeezed his hand in a overly firm handshake, nearly breaking it.

"So, you want to do lunch or somet-"

Just then, Mystique, Toad, and Aldrich Killian emerged from the crowds flocking the nearby sidewalk.

"Uh…"

"Run for it, Jennifer. These guys mean business."

Before She-Hulk could do anything, Killian lunged at her.

"Take th-"

As a green fist slammed into Killian's cheek, a burning sensation overtook its owner.

"Do your homework, green gal. I tend to burn people…in more ways than one, if you catch my drift."

Before She-Hulk could respond, Killian grabbed her by the arms and put a rag doused with chloroform over her mouth and nose.

"Sheesh, you're a heavy one." he muttered as he dragged the unconscious giant woman into a nearby alley.

Just then, his cell phone rang.

"Mysti, that you?"

"_It's Mystique to you, Killian. I've got your green compatriot's friend in tow. Perhaps we can save him for later experiments-_"

"About that. I'm not too sure this blood's going to be fresh for when we use it."

"_And what are you going to do about it-_"

"I'm thinking Extremis. That should preserve it."


	9. The Leader- Part 3

Chapter 9: The Leader, Part 3

THE NEXT DAY:

"My aching head…"

McGee tottered off a well-worn cot and walked into a plexiglass wall. On the other side of it was a sneering man in a lab coat, his enlarged skull bearing a passing resemblance to a brain, albeit covered with jaundiced skin.

"The hell are you?"

"I am the Leader, scientist extraordinaire."

"Who can I thank- MIT or Berkley?"

"Gamma."

McGee paused.

"You remind me of someone. A big green guy with anger management issues. Except you're as smart as he is strong."

"You dare compare me to that sniveling idiot Banner?"

"How do you know him?"

"We were classmates. I, Samuel Sterns, was undoubtedly the brighter of us-"

McGee mentally blocked out the Leader's rant.

"-and that is how I reached my current position."

"So what do you need me for?"

"I need you to record my achievements. Starting today, you will chronicle the creation of supermen and women."

"And who are you starting with? Me?"

The Leader snorted.

"No. I have a better test subject in mind."

"The green gal?"

"No."

The mutated brainiac snapped his fingers, and a light shone on an operating table with a woman tied to it.

"Who's she? Someone you picked off the street?"

"Is that any way to address Elizabeth Ross?"

"Ross as in-"

"General T. Ross? Yes."

The Leader snapped again, and white-suited orderlies ran to the bedside.

"Prepare for the procedure."

As if on cue, IVs containing a red-tinged greenish liquid were run into Betty's arms.

"The hell?"

"Your green compatriot's blood. Albeit preserved by the addition of Extremis, hence the red."

McGee watched as the blood ran into the patient's veins before finally stopping.

"Operation was a success, Doctor Sterns."

"Excellent. Now then, take her and the reporter to the holding cell."


	10. The Leader- Part 4

Chapter 10: The Leader, Part 4

"Hello, this is Rick Jones. If you've got a problem, shop's closed until morning-"

"_Rick, this is Jennifer. I'm in a bit of a jam at the moment, and I'm going to need your help._"

"I'm listening…"

"How'd you get cell reception in this place?" McGee complained as She-Hulk hung up.

"I have a good plan."

Betty blinked her eyes as she looked up at the ceiling of the holding cell.

"Where am I? And who are you?"

McGee cleared his throat.

"Jack McGee, _Daily Bugle_."

She-Hulk extended her hand.

"Jennifer Walters, attorney-at-law."

"Why are you green?"

"It's a long story. Let's just say it involved a transfusion-"

"You got the blood from Bruce Banner, didn't you?"

"How could you tell?"

"Skin's a dead giveaway."

She-Hulk chuckled.

"Nice to see we're getting along here, but we need a way out before Thunderbolt Ross shows up and brings this place down on our heads! Or before Bruce does. Or before this gal hulks out and does Bruce's job for him-"

"Or a certain reporter could do something to get us out of here."

McGee paused for thought before diving towards the door's lock.

"For crying out loud, who uses these locks anymore? Anyone got a hairpin or two?"

Betty reached out, removed two pins from her hair, and handed them to McGee.

"So, any idea of where Jennifer is?" Rick asked as he and Bruce Banner drove out into the desert.

"I can smell her. Take a left here."

"And- _ta da_! The lock is now opened, and we are out of this place!"

The trio emerged from the cell into the corridor.

"Less on theatrics, Jack." Betty muttered as she made a run for the exit.

"Try and keep up, Mister McGee." She-Hulk responded.

"The trail stops here."

Rick killed the truck's engine and got out, with Bruce following shortly thereafter.

"That door's solid steel. I don't think there's a way inside."

Bruce grinned.

"Rick, make me mad. I dare you."

"Uh-"

"Go on."

"The guys who came up with luminiferous ether were right!"

Bruce's face contorted into a look of irritation.

"The tax code is good as it is!"

"Go on!"

"Your mom's the reason for the population boom out here!"

That did it.

"Yep. That's your cousin, Jen." McGee muttered upon hearing the Hulk's roar.

"Good. Now let's-"

Just then, a guard turned around the corner.

"Oh no you don't!"

A full clip of rifle rounds was discharged at She-Hulk to no effect.

"Oh-"

Betty's eyes turned yellow, and she began to gain muscles.

"_Nobody shoots my friends!_"

She grew taller, and her skin turned red. The guard whimpered and ran, just as the Hulk broke into the facility.

"MCGEE! JENNIFER! COME HERE!"

"Great idea, big guy! Glad I thought of it!"

The four bolted out the Hulk-sized hole in the door and got a good distance away from the Leader's facility.


	11. Reunited

Chapter 11: Reunited

"Good morning, Bruce."

Banner turned around and saw a familiar young woman standing next to his bed in the hotel room.

"Betty? How'd you get-"

"It's a long story, Bruce." McGee muttered from his bed.

"Define 'long story', McGee."

"I'm not completely sure of the exact details, but from what I gleaned at that base you trashed, miss Ross got nabbed by Mystique by orders of some guy called Samuel Sterns."

Bruce tilted his head.

"And what happened in the intervening time?"

McGee rose from his bed and nudged Betty.

"Do it."

"Do what?"

"What you did at the lab."

Betty nodded, closed her eyes, and got to it.

"Let's do this."

Her eyes flew open and turned yellow. Almost immediately, she grew to about seven feet in height and gained a significant amount of muscle, her skin turning red in the process.

"Come on, Bruce. Tell me how I look."

Bruce looked up and saw the transformed Betty.

"How the-"

"Sterns's experiments." McGee answered.

Bruce fainted on the spot.

LATER:

"Betty, I'm sorry for what happened to you-"

Betty gave a slight laugh.

"Bruce, don't be. As far as I'm concerned, this is a plus. I've got super-strength, killer looks, and probably more. And I've got control over this."

Banner was silent as Betty picked him up and laid a series of colossal kisses on his cheek and lips.


End file.
